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Donyatsu: Square Enix's Post APOCALYPTIC Doughnut-Cats?

9/21/2015

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Reruns of Donyatsu currently air on Crunchyroll. The series only lasted 12 episodes with the ending airing separately as a 13th "bonus" short. Episodes last less than two minutes.

This may be the first family-friendly short series to hit Crunchyroll. If I'm wrong on that, I will gladly correct this post.

Donyatsu believe it or not, is actually produced by Square Enix, the same people behind Final Fantasy, if you can believe it. Watching all 12 episodes, you would likely never notice.

Donyatsu takes place in a post-apocalyptic world, where the only surviving creatures left on Earth are wicked mice, and very soft-hearted, doughnut-cats. The concept sounds dark and freaky.... and yet it never comes across as dark at all. In fact, what caused the apocalypse isn't even really explained, and it's probably the cleanest apocalyptic show ever to hit television.

Each short finds Donyatsu and his friends playing, goofing around and basically enjoying friendship. The plot never seems to get very thick, and the visuals steer clear of being too scary. Probably the closest thing to a scary moment would be the "Tummy Ache" episode, but again, the visuals are less threatening than an episode of Sesame Street. Random shots of outer space show that the original intent was to take the cats outside orbit, but this ends up being more for the manga.

Donyatsu is soft, easy on the eyes, and doesn't overstay it's welcome. The manga is only slightly darker, but isn't very scary either. A decent starter series for small tots.

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My Wife is the Student Council President... and she's 15 until episode 11.

9/18/2015

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My Wife is the Student Council President currently airs on Crunchyroll every Thursday at 2:30 PM EST. You must be a member over age 18 to watch it. Free subscribers can watch only the edited version, while Premium subscribers have access to the uncensored version. Each episode is 7-8 minutes long with most clocking out at 7:52.  It is unclear if a second season is in the works. Seven graphic novels have been printed in Japan since 2012.

Where do I even start on this one?

My Wife is the Student Council President is a new short anime series, based off of the manga "Okusama ga Seito Kaichō" which has been running since January of 2012. (HOW??) As of July, the series has had it's 8th graphic novel published in Japan (WHY??) but the anime just started July 2nd on Crunchyroll. It's very first season should be wrapping up soon, and it has not been said if a second season will air or not.

And believe me, it's a hard sell. 

It was all I could do to force myself to watch all (as of right now) eleven episodes both censored and uncensored, just so I could give this article a fair shot. Episode one I was ready to throw in the towel, but I can't base a whole review on just one, 7:52 minute episode, now can I?

Yes, this IS very long. If that bothers you, I have plenty of shorter articles, and shorter reviews are coming, but I needed to get this off my chest.

As a warning, even the censored "TV Print" is extremely raunchy. I'm not even sure how the BPO hasn't gotten to this show yet, especially since it airs not only online, but on the Japanese TV stations AT-X, TVS, KBS, tvk, and SUN-TV. The censored cut replaces the graphic images with cardboard cut-outs of the characters being "wacky" or interacting with live-action props and animals, but the audio is left 100% alone, leaving nothing to the imagination. Again, I'm surprised Japan's TV censors haven't had a group coronary yet. At least AT-X airs the show after midnight, but still...

The series follows Hayato, a high school student, living by himself, who is also the vice-president of the student council. In the first episode, it looks as though he will become the next president of the student council, when suddenly, his campaign is uprooted by Ui (pictured above). Ui wins over the entire school by passing out condoms and proclaiming her term as president to be all about free love.

Not only does Ui win, but she later becomes Hayato's self-proclaimed wife. And seeing as how they now exist in an arranged marriage anyway, after Hayato reveals their parents drunkenly set them up in the arranged marriage when they were three years old,  this leaves Hayato choice-less. Ui moves into Hayato's apartment and decides to ruin his life. Is this supposed to be funny?

Ui is not happy just taking up space and ordering Hayato around to do her chores while she eats snacks, watches TV and reads manga. She also tries to rape him. In almost every episode. UM EXCUSE ME???? Did I miss the memo on rape being funny??? Last time I checked, not only was rape of either gender not funny, it was also ~ what's that? Oh yeah ~ ILLEGAL!!!

So how does Hayato respond? Simple. By being uptight, calling Ui horrific names, smacking her with a shoe, hitting her, and occasionally, sexually teasing her. Wait, what the fuck?? HOW does this solve the problem?? How about kick the psycho to the curb and call the police? How about disown every single person trying to force you two together? Is there no common sense here??

But this is the strange writing of My Wife Is The Student Council President. Hayato is being used as a slave in his own home, and is sexually assaulted by Ui every other chance she gets, but at the same time, he also wants to go all the way with her. And yet, although Ui tries to rape him, she usually stops just before they take it to the next level. IT MAKES NO SENSE!!!

But of course, what's a "comedy" about rape, without a rambunctious cast of equally questionable characters?

Ui's mother Misato for example, is proud to give them sex advice and for Ui, rape tips. And why not? She was the one who arranged their marriage while stinking drunk. And if that doesn't make her absolutely creepy, maybe this bit will, she looks ten years old. She's very proud to look ten years old after giving birth to a teenager. And she loves that her husband loves that after all these years, she still looks ten years old. PLEASE TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE BOTHERED HERE!!

When Hayato is not being raped by Ui, he is being screamed at by Rin, the self-appointed head of the disciplinary committee.... that nobody in school asked for.... voted on.... wanted.... and seemingly only has her in it. Rin denounces anything she thinks is "immoral" behavior, to the point of stalking Hayato and Ui, so she can foil their attempts at kissing, hugging or doing anything she thinks is naughty. WHO is Rin? Why does her opinion count? Nobody knows, and it doesn't. And seemingly, nobody in the entire town has the brainpower to tell her that to her face. The only justification (CAN I even use this word?) I can find, is in episode 4, where she tells Hayato that when her breasts came in large, many of the kids at school decided to spread rumors about her for fun. So she became a self-appointed censor, so she could make people believe she's too pious for sexual activity...... even though she has sexual ideas planned for Hayato, who does but doesn't have feelings for her. Did that make sense to you? No? Good, you're fine then.

Rin's older sister Kei is the school nurse. Kei is raising Rin on her own, and moves into the apartment next door to Hayato, so she can spy on him. When she gets bored, she likes to dress like a hooker, and has already tried to not only rape Hayato, but get her kid sister involved as well. WHAT THE FUCK???

Makoto is a tiny high schooler, who behaves much like Rin, except she pees on herself and takes graphic photos of people when they aren't looking. Like Rin, she feels it's just fine to barge into Hayato's life, and start bossing him around... even though SHE IS A TOTAL STRANGER!!

Aside from being under constant attack, Hayato's entire life revolves around telling lies to everyone at school, so nobody will find out he is living alone with Ui. Why? Because he is worried over what people might say.

Here's a question. WHO FUCKING CARES????

Seriously! Who cares if you're shacking up with Ui? Shouldn't you be less concerned with how COMPLETE AND TOTAL STRANGERS look at you, and more concerned that there are several psychos, trying to sexually assault you and ruin your life??

Well episode 11 semi-answered this question for me. Aside from his fear of losing face to a bunch of abject strangers, perhaps Hayato is worried, because he's been getting sexually involved with a 15 year old girl. Yeah, that's right. Ui doesn't even hit 16 until episode 11. Granted, Hayato and Ui as of now are the same age, but since in their prefecture, the legal age of marriage is 16, it may have caused concern until Ui's birthday.

.... And is anybody else freaked out that there are two sixteen year olds, living ALONE together and trying to rape each other????

Look, I'm not a prude. sex has it's place in anime, and I'm fine with more shows dealing with it. But would it kill some of these "writers" to do these scenes with consenting adults instead of rape-happy teenagers?? I wouldn't care if Hayato and Ui were eighteen and willing, but this has gone too far.

I'm sure some of you might be looking around for the "comment" button, and I encourage you to start typing. I already know Chris Beveridge of The Fandom Post has just written the show off as "silly and harmless" and those of you looking the show up right now on Wikipedia might be reading that and thinking "TCH AUGH!! Stupid Codename Sailor Earth. There she goes again, totally missing the point that Japan's culture is all about underage sex scenes, why can't she just lighten up?" but you won't see me budge on this one.

My Wife Is The Student Council President is as obnoxious as it's insipidly long title. It's creepy, nonsensical, is clearly drawn by PedoBears and has no idea when to quit. 

Thankfully, I do, and this will be the last time I'll be watching.

In case I haven't mentioned this before, I'm very anti-rape regardless of gender, so I'd like to take a moment and ask you all to check out RAINN. They're one of the most important charities we have today. They offer education and support for victims, and so much more. They are currently fighting to end sexual abuse and to reform laws regarding the issue in countries where it's all but the norm.

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Barakamon: The artist who needs a new lock

9/6/2015

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Barakamon re-runs currently air on Hulu and Funimation. The anime series is 12 episodes long and aired for one season in 2014, while the manga has been running non-stop in Japanese and in English since 2009.

Seishū Handa is a champion calligrapher, and despite being only 23 years old, is already a veteran of his craft.


.... And good luck getting anybody to respect that.

One fine day, his writing is on display at a luxury exhibition. Everything seems fine, until the elderly, uptight curator, starts criticizing the artwork, calling it textbook, among other droll adjectives.

.... Needless to say, Seishū beats the crap out of the old man, but despite defending his art, is now seen as a monster, and most of his old friends abandon him.

In order to help his son save face, Seishū's stodgy father sends him quickly to Gotō Island, located in the middle of nowhere, but near Kyūshū. The hope is that Seishū will relax, get a new perspective on life.

But one thing Seishū just can't seem to do, is get strong enough locks on his door.

Plucky seven-year-old Naru Kotoishi is just one of several redneck islanders, who invite themselves into Seishū's home in every episode, despite his pleas. His new home used to be the secret club of the local kids, and nobody is willing to let that go. But of all the kids, Naru takes to Seishū the fastest, dubbing herself his official "commuter wife". Where did she learn this adult and inappropriate slang term from? 14-year-old delinquent girls Miwa and Tamako, who have also made duplicate keys to Seishū's house. Miwa is a horrible influence on Naru, while Tamako is addicted to reading Boys Love/Yaoi Hentai. As the series moves along, we are introduced to more children and some very strange adults, and none who understand the concept of privacy.


But for as annoying as the villagers are, to a degree, Seishū does actually learn a little from them. He picks up little lessons about the local culture and about seeing his art in a new light, and the local kids appoint him their unofficial calligraphy teacher. But for the most part, Seishū just wants to be left alone to find himself, and to work on calligraphy in a new way.


Barakamon may have a title that sounds similar to our 44th president, but is not political in nature. It's a funny slice of life that doesn't overstay it's welcome.

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Wakaba * Girl ~ The Cutest rich girl you know!

9/2/2015

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Wakaba * Girl airs Fridays at 11:40 am EST on Crunchyroll and again on Hulu. The first season has wrapped, and it is unknown if another season will be planned. Hulu ran the episodes five behind Crunchyroll and just recently received the last three. The show is based off of a 2013 manga and each episode lasts 7 minutes, 50 seconds.

Every single time the economy collapses, we get a new Batman film.

Think about it. Stock Market Crash of 1989, Batman. Final years of the Bush Administration? Batman trilogy. China just dropped the value of their dollar, and another Batman movie is on the way for 2016.

Why? Simple. Batman is that lovable rich boy turned vigilante, who purchases his own weapons and chases after the villains that occasionally, exist because of him.

.... Well we must be in for one hell of a financial free-fall, because coming out of Japan is the most adorable rich girl in recent history!!

Wakaba * Girl follows young lady Wakaba, who was living a very sheltered, rich girl life, until her grades sunk to remedial levels, forcing her to attend a regular, public high school.

... And she couldn't be happier!

Wakaba thinks the coolest thing in the world is regular suburban life. Each episode, she learns how to shop at a convenience store, drink soda and do all of the normal, every day things we "commoners" take for granted. 

But, she's not a snob. In fact, she's the most grateful young lady you'll ever meet. Constantly happy and thankful for every little experience, and most of all, thankful to the point of tears for her friends. Wakaba-chan is always looking for ways to help people, and she is often quick to throw money at anybody offering her a bit of kindness. (A trait from her mother.)

Her friends Nao, Mao and Moeko don't always understand why Wakaba gets so excited about the little things, but they help her adjust along the way, introducing her to the "gyaru" lifestyle, which includes lessons in cooking, how to drink soda and BL (Boy's Love) and other romantic video games. Wakaba in turn is helpful to a fault, always trying to find ways to help her new friends get a leg up in school.

Also supporting Wakaba are her older sister and very young looking mother, who raise her. Wakaba's father is rarely seen, due to his work.

In the last episodes, we learn why Wakaba is so grateful for her friends. They're her first friends ever, as she spent most of her childhood moving around. Fortunately, she is here to stay as of the last episode, as her family decides not to further jeopardize her happiness.

This slice of life is designed to make your normal, mundane life seem like candy and sprinkles. It's cute, funny and paints rich girls out to be sheltered and sweet.

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    Codename Sailor earth

    Codename Sailor Earth is a lifelong anime and wrestling fan. IRL she is cartoonist Koriander Bullard, formerly Koriander Ake, a happily married Chicagoan. Her favorite anime is Sailor Moon. A baby in the late 80's, the first anime titles she ever saw were Speed Racer, Voltron and Robotech.

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